Where have all the updates gone?!

I can imagine that a lot of people are thinking: "What the hell has happened to you? Why stopped updating?" In fact, I've had many people writing to me and asking why I have stopped writing and am I still continuing. Well, the answer to that is - I am still continuing!

I realise that there have been some authors who have pulled their stories from Fanfiction.net and Twilighted because of a so-called database that collects fanfic stories and stores them so in case an author decides to publish that story, there is a place you can still read it for free.

I can understand why many readers will be disappointed with the authors for pulling their fics when they haven't been completed yet (I am sad at the end for Finding Bella by ekimmuh - it was one of my favourites!) but really, look at it from an author's point of view and try to understand what they're going through.

Writing Fanfiction, as I'm sure a lot of you will know, is extremely time consuming. Yes, you can complain about all these authors not updating enough, but imagine balancing a busy real life with writing! Professional authors don't finish a novel in a few days, it takes years to get it just right - as does Fanfiction. A lot of time and hard work goes into these stories and you guys get to read it for free. We don't get paid for writing Fanfiction and yet there are authors out there who are getting paid a bloody load of royalties for published work that in some cases, is worse than Fanfiction.

So, my view on this database is that if the authors want to pull the story because they could potentially be making a sum of money on their work, then so be it. It's a luxury that we can read these high quality stories for free so if the story stops, that's just bad luck for the readers I'm afraid. However, there is a silver lining in this cloud. If the author is pulling them to publish the story, then hopefully we can rightfully buy the book in the future!

So before you have a go at these authors, put yourself in their shoes! For all you readers & especially reviewers out there, imagine if you were told that your reviews were worth I don't know, a few hundred each, just so long as you took them off a website? You'd do it, wouldn't you?

Anyway, those are just my views. I've seen some abuse some authors are getting for this and I don't think it's right.

On the brighter side, I'm settling into my new job and new life now, so I'm planning on getting the Fanfiction back and running as of next week/beginning of December. Thank you all for being so patient.

Edie

Unexpectedly Chapter 17 Teaser!

I've been a bit MIA recently, and I'm so sorry! I've actually dropped out (sort of) from university because I was pushed into a course that I didn't want to do, so now I'm working my arse off for papers and charities, so that I can go for something a lot better next year - which means I am busy busy busy! However, I will do my best to update as hopefully, I should be studying Journalism next year.

Anyway, here is a teaser to keep you entertained in the mean time!

--

“Isabella,” he whispered again, trying to soothe her. Guilt came over him as he pondered on whether he had gone too far.

“Bella, Bella, Bella,” he tried, hoping that using the name that other’s called her might calm her down.

But it didn’t.

She wasn’t just sniffling into his chest, no, she was properly crying; actual sobs were coming from her. He held her face gently and brought it out from hiding in his chest. It pained him to see her face so tearstained and indignant. “What’s wrong, love? Please, why are you crying?”

She sniffed a few times before finally answering. It was hard to make out what she was saying when she was crying so much. “Everything…everything is just going wrong,” she sobbed. “Everything was so perfect….and now, well, it isn’t.”

Edward rubbed her arms, still holding her to his chest. “Isabella, I am so sorry. I thought you wanted… I wasn’t sure… I’m so sorry I did that. Oh God, I’m sorry.”

“No!” she screamed, which startled Edward. “That was perfect. That was everything I could have ever wished for. Its just now, we can’t ever do that again. Never.”

He sighed and pulled her back into his chest. “Oh, Isabella…” he sighed. “Don’t say such silly things.”

She sat back, and pushed away from him. “Well, what do you want me to say, Edward? We love each other and we can’t be together. You know, I may not have any experience with this kind of thing, or even know anyone who has, but I’ve, well, I’ve read enough books to know that there have been many situations like ours, and everyone always ends up okay. But us? Why can’t we? Why does nothing ever go right? I just want to love you, I want people to accept me and us, but after all my dad’s been through…”

“After all your dad’s been through? Really, Isabella?” Edward said, his voice raised. “Will you stop just thinking about your dad for once?”

She opened her mouth, shocked that Edward would say such a thing. He, of all people, should know how much family meant. “Edward, I can’t believe…”

“Look, I didn’t mean it like that. But he isn’t the only person involved in this. In fact, from my point of view, this relationship is only between two people – you and I.”

Bella thought for a moment, being silenced momentarily by the truth of Edward’s words. “But it still affects my dad. He worries what people will think of me – and you! There’s still Rose, and Honey, and Irina… and the whole town! There’s something not right about it all… it just… well…”

“So what? Are you really going to give up one thing that makes you happy just because of these people? Or is there something else holding you back? Because I think if you loved someone as much as you say you do, there wouldn’t be anything holding you back. So, please… enlighten me.”

“You don’t believe me?” Bella gave a loud and exasperated sigh. “Okay, so I don’t care about Irina and Rose as much as I used to. I’m not as scared of them as I was, okay? But my dad…he has been through a lot.”

“What about you? Have you not been through a lot? Are you honestly going to risk ever being happy so you won’t hurt your father?” Edward asked, attempting not to burst with frustration. He knew Bella was still fragile and couldn’t risk breaking her.

Bella then spoke softly and quietly, as if to herself. “It’s a little different than just hurting him. Everything with my mom…well, it’s complicated. I just know that he couldn’t bear to lose me, not after the way my mom was taken,” she sighed, her eyes welling up with tears again. Before she knew it, she was back into Edward’s arms and he was soothing her.

“Ssh,” Edward appeased.

“So it can’t be okay, Edward. How could I do that to my father out of choice?” she sobbed.

Edward stroked her hair. “Sometimes you have to do things for yourself, Isabella. I know he’s mad at the moment, but sometimes for love you have to…”

“My mom…” Bella began. “She loved someone before... and then she died.”

--


Hmmmmm lots of drama, I can assure you! See ya soon,
EDIE X

New Facebook Page

You know those pages on Facebook where EVERYONE "likes" them? Yeah, well, now you can "like" ME! Muahahaha.

All you have to do is follow the link below and "like" it!

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Edie-Swan/151165688258586

And no, this isn't just an ego boost where I'm doing this because I don't have any friends (I do have them, honest!) but you can actually ask me anything on here and use the discussion boards on the page to ask me questions on the story or ask other people what they think of something. It's pretty cool!

Plus, I will be posting loads of things on there. I find that Facebook is pretty much the easiest thing to use for me, so I can post links for when I update, photos that go with any of the stories and anything else that might be pleasing!

So I hope you "like" me (haha) and hope we can get Facebooking soon! Au revoir!

ES X

Unexpectedly Chapter 16 Teaser II

Here is another teaser from Unexpectedly Chapter 16: The Goodbye a.k.a. smoocha-cheesy-kissy-fluff-a-thon.

I should be updating the full chapter on Fanfiction.net tomorrow and also Twilighted.net closely following. Enjoy until then!

~*~

“I think… I think I am ready…for more,” she said after a while, with added determination. Then she seemed hesitant about what to say next. “I just want… to love you.”

She saw Edward put this together slowly in his mind, and then she saw actual tears come to his eyes. Edward had been brought up to think that he was never allowed to cry – that wasn’t manly – no matter what happened to him. He was supposed to remain strong and composed. But he had sat up and turned his back to Bella now, and it seemed that he was breathing slowly and deeply for a very long time.

And then he picked her up and she held on tightly to his broad shoulders. He lay her down tenderly again. He looked into her eyes as she looked lovingly back into his, which made him say, without thinking, “Isabella, tell me what you want me to do. Even if it’s impossible, I’ll do it. I swear it. Tell me.”

All the words that Bella wanted to say were lodged inside of her, as if just before the entrance to her mouth. Her eyes spilled tears, which Edward dabbed off with his fingers, as if he could ruin a priceless painting by touching it too roughly.

Then Bella turned her face up to look at him, her eyes wide and almost ochre in the setting sunlight that was passing through the window of Edward’s bedroom. She then shut her eyes and then pursed her lips slightly. She wanted to kiss him again. Edward groaned.

“If I start now, I’m afraid that I will lose control. I know how much you have progressed, Isabella – I have seen it with my own eyes. But it’s only been two months since you have started experiencing life, love. I can’t take advantage of you. I won’t let myself.”

Her eyes willed him on. Her body willed him on. She traced the hemline of his collar on his shirt and bit her lip. It was suggestive in the most modest way, but completely irresistible. She followed her finger slowly with her eyes, and then she looked back at him.

“I can’t…”

She gazed at him with pleading eyes – the eyes that had lured him in on the day he had first met her; the same eyes that had carried so much pain and disorientation which now only contained longing and love. If she could have spoken at that moment, he was sure that she would have told him that she loved him and would do anything for him, and that he should do that same.

~*~

Unexpectedly Chapter 16 Teaser

Beware: this is a pretty steamy teaser. And yes, this is from the right story.
Have fun!

--

Then there was the awkward silence again. Both of them returned back to their meals, but Bella was no longer hungry. In fact, she felt a little bit queasy. It frustrated her copiously that she couldn’t reciprocate what Edward had just said, so she fought furiously with her mind to let herself at least show him that she felt the same way.

She put her fork down which made a clank sound so loud that Edward paused mid-mouthful. He chewed the remaining food in his mouth as he watched Bella, wide-eyed, getting up from her chair and looking at him intently with her large brown eyes. For one second, he could have sworn that they were almost lustful, but he knew that they were definitely determined, anyhow. The thought of her excited him, and the electric current that they both regularly felt made a return with a full-forced impact. Edward sat still waiting for the shock.

Bella leaned towards him, her hair falling in front of her, which would have formed a curtain if Edward hadn’t impulsively tucked her hair behind her ears. They both stared at each other; love, adoration and yes, it was definitely lust, Edward had decided, radiated between them. Edward wanted to hold Bella so tight to him and never let go, but his arms were not moving from her face yet. As she leaned closer, he grasped her jaw gently and let his thumb trace her nose, down to her lips, to sweep lightly across her chin and jaw line before pausing to look into her eyes. She was the most beautiful girl, no woman, he had ever seen.

“You’re beautiful,” he whispered as he made the final closure between his and her lips.

A kiss had never been so sweet. Bella had been pretty sure that no kiss could have beaten the ones they had shared already, even if there were few. However, this knocked them all off the chart. Their lips moved together as if made for each other. She sucked onto his bottom lip, while he nibbled lightly on her top lip. Soon, she was sitting on his lap, straddling him so that they could reach a higher level of contact, as if kissing finally wasn’t enough.

--

Woah, woah, woah.

Remember to follow this blog as I will be using it more.
Lots of love! ES

Unexpectedly Chapter 15 Teaser II

I wanted to post the full chapter tonight but I am almost dead with exhaustion and because I live in the UK, there is a time difference and I can't stay awake that long to get the chapter back from the beta and edit it (trust me, I'm trying) so here is another sneak preview of what is to come.

Bella sighed after she had sent the message but in her view, there was nothing else she could do.
How could she leave her father after everything they had been through together? Obviously her heart and her mind belonged to Edward, but she couldn’t allow herself to be so egocentric. She knew that her father would have never left her in any clause, so she gave herself no sanction to do the same.

She cried that night into her pillow, almost hating her devotion to her father that allowed Edward’s lone departure. In a way, she felt selfish again, knowing that Edward had felt alone and that when they were together, she had helped to wipe that poignant emotion away. She felt melancholy as she remembered his pained look on the first day that she had met him when he had come into Crumbs, and then compared it to the look on his face after he had kissed her. She saw how contented she made him feel, and she knew that he made her feel exactly the same.

As she wept into her pillow, she regarded the bracelet that Edward had given her and she cried even harder. Why did everything with her have to be so distressing and complicated? For the first time since she had met Edward, she just wanted to be normal.

That night she dreamed of Edward Cullen. She dreamed of his touch and nothing else.


--


The full chapter will be posted when I wake up. Lots of love.
Edie

Unexpectedly Chapter 15 Teaser

Hola people! Sorry I've taken so long with this stuff; I've been to Bulgaria, Spain and Geneva this month - I've literally had no time! I did write some in Geneva though and I am back now, and have got 2 chapters on hand. So I thought I would publish a teaser for chapter 15 before I whack up the whole thing after I've got it from the beta.

Enjoy! :)

Transparent thoughts were running through his head at an almost unthinkable speed. There didn’t seem to be any logical reasoning behind his current behaviour, yet irrational thoughts and premonitions were still transpiring. How was it that one person could make him act like this, despite his seeming repute for being conscientious, caring and completely based on reason?

It was stupid, well, he was being stupid – at present, anyway. His character seemed to be surprising himself at every turn since four months ago when he had found Rose in his bedroom in flagrante. However, the text message had been the most unanticipated so far, even for him. He couldn’t even tell whether his mind had even meant it or whether he had just become so desperate because he feared a loss. It wasn’t a loss like a twenty dollar bill or even a lost investment – it was a loss of his solace; a loss of one of the only things that was urging him to keep on going.

He had Honey, and of course that meant the world to him, but Bella brought him a different kind of sanctuary and succour to his life. Edward had always lived for Honey, but Honey a part of his family life with Rose. Although the association to his estranged wife didn’t make a difference to his unconditional love for his daughter, he found that his extraordinary relationship with Bella was almost something he could call his own: his personal delicate discovery.

Perhaps asking her to come to Seattle was completely unfounded, of course it was, but he was desperate. After that alarmingly terrifying conversation with her father, he became scared. All of a sudden, he was no longer the well renowned attorney with a confident facade and a brilliant persona; he was a scared little boy with no direction. Where was he supposed to go from here? It seemed specious to stay in Forks after a stern word with the Chief of Police, so Seattle seemed the perfect option. But was it right to leave Bella?

At first, yes, he had thought it would have been the best option: to leave her there before her feelings, like his, grew any more powerful or unfathomable. She could have made a clean start; she had only just turned eighteen, after all. Someone at that age would have treated it as a learning curve or a strange anecdote to use in a few years when recounting past mistakes. However, Bella was different. She was unlike anyone he had ever met and that, to him, was what made him send the text message. She was too exceptional to just leave behind.

Conceivably, it wasn’t the best way to let her know that, despite the world being at odds against them, what with her father added onto the list with Rose, her lawyers and of course the terrible excuse for a human being, Irina. On the other hand, it was probably an accurate manifestation of how serious Edward felt about this girl. It was strange how they could both feel this way so quickly and so suddenly. But how can anyone really explain the connection they feel to the person that they love? It just happens, Edward thought, and it just did.

He waited for Bella’s response as he drove up to Seattle, relishing the long roads of nothing that were calming his psyche. He wasn’t sure of how he wanted to respond; he just wanted to let her know that he was still going to be there for her, if she would let him.

--

I'll put up the rest of the chapter on FanFiction.net as soon as I am done making the edits.
Lots of love,
Edie